NO MORE DUCK SYNDROME

EPISODE #0013

THE CONFIDENT MOM PODCAST

 

 

• What is duck syndrome – and how it has become a toxic part of your life
• Why fighting against it will increase your happiness.
• 5 specific ways to stop the syndrome

 

 

 

 

WHAT IS IT?

 

In 2003, Duke jolted academia with a report describing how its female students felt pressure to be “effortlessly perfect”: smart, accomplished, fit, beautiful and popular, all without visible effort. At Stanford, it’s called the Duck Syndrome. A duck appears to glide calmly across the water, while beneath the surface it frantically, relentlessly paddles.

 

 

The perception of a perfect life

“believes social media is a huge contributor to the misperception among students that peers aren’t also struggling.”  It’s easy to see how this could contribute to a feeling of loneliness and helplessness.

 

 

 

 

 

WHY I’M THINKING ABOUT DUCKS:

 

1. Because Ellie is obsessed.
2. Because I have suffered from both sides of effects of duck syndrome

WHY TO FIGHT AGAINST IT:

 

• Inauthentic
• Isolating
• Exhausting
• False and based on lies from our enemy
• Discourages us and discourages others – lifts no one up
• Self-glorifying – when we fall prey to duck syndrome we are focused on impressing others, not necessarily on making an impression in the world

 

HOW TO STOP THE SYNDROME:

 

1. Be honest with your struggle
2. Let people see your mess
3. Live to love and build up others – not yourself
4. Acknowledge your hard work (and give yourself periods of rest to glide)
5. Change your goals (go against perfectionistic thinking and other people’s opinions / strive to significance, not success)