NO MORE DUCK SYNDROME
EPISODE #0013
THE CONFIDENT MOM PODCAST
- What is duck syndrome – and how it has become a toxic part of your life
- Why fighting against it will increase your happiness.
- 5 specific ways to stop the syndrome
WHAT IS IT?
In 2003, Duke jolted academia with a report describing how its female students felt pressure to be “effortlessly perfect”: smart, accomplished, fit, beautiful and popular, all without visible effort. At Stanford, it’s called the Duck Syndrome. A duck appears to glide calmly across the water, while beneath the surface it frantically, relentlessly paddles.
The perception of a perfect life
“believes social media is a huge contributor to the misperception among students that peers aren’t also struggling.” It’s easy to see how this could contribute to a feeling of loneliness and helplessness.
WHY I’M THINKING ABOUT DUCKS:
- Because Ellie is obsessed.
- Because I have suffered from both sides of effects of duck syndrome
WHY TO FIGHT AGAINST IT:
- Inauthentic
- Isolating
- Exhausting
- False and based on lies from our enemy
- Discourages us and discourages others – lifts no one up
- Self-glorifying – when we fall prey to duck syndrome we are focused on impressing others, not necessarily on making an impression in the world
HOW TO STOP THE SYNDROME:
- Be honest with your struggle
- Let people see your mess
- Live to love and build up others – not yourself
- Acknowledge your hard work (and give yourself periods of rest to glide)
- Change your goals (go against perfectionistic thinking and other people’s opinions / strive to significance, not success)