Podcast #554

 

REINVENTING YOURSELF 

At any moment, you have the power to reinvent yourself and reinvent the story of your future. In this episode we’re diving into the process of how to reinvent yourself, how to know what to drop and how to practice being the person you want to become. This is a transformation process that you can start, no matter your age. 

In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we’re coaching on:

  • Deciding who you want to be, no matter your age
  • Becoming that version of yourself that you can be
  • Actionable steps to reinventing yourself 

START IMAGINING:

Who do you want to be 10 years from now?

What do your net worth to be?

What contribution will you be making in society?

What story will future generations tell about you?

ANNOUNCEMENT:

This is the one time of year we offer this publicly.

Get lifetime access to coaching with me.

Just a one-time payment of $2997.

www.collegeofconfidence.com/lifetime

This means you get access to everything we’ve ever offered.

And everything we’ll ever offer. 

STARTING REFLECTIONS

  1. What aspects of my current life or self do I feel unsatisfied or unfulfilled with?
  2. What are my core values and beliefs, and how well are they aligned with my current lifestyle?
  3. What are my passions, interests, and talents that I haven’t fully explored or utilized?
  4. What are the biggest fears or limitations holding me back from making significant changes?
  5. How do I envision my ideal life or self? What does success and happiness mean to me?
  6. What are the key skills or knowledge I need to acquire or improve upon to achieve my desired reinvention?
  7. What steps can I take to challenge myself and step out of my comfort zone?
  8. Who are the people or communities that inspire me or share similar aspirations? How can I connect with them?
  9. What habits or patterns do I need to break or replace in order to support my reinvention?
  10. How can I create a practical and realistic action plan to initiate and sustain the changes needed for my reinvention?

Remember, self-reflection is a personal journey, and the answers to these questions may evolve over time. Use them as a starting point to gain clarity and set yourself on a path of reinvention and personal growth.

Where are you dissatisfied?

What habits are holding you back?

What do you want your relationship with food to be like?

What do you want your relationship with your body to be like?

What do you want your relationship with time to be like?

What do you want your relationship with alcohol to be like?

What do you want your relationship with money to be like?

YOU 1.0 VERSUS YOU 2.0 

Having just turned 40, I get to ask myself who I want to be in my 40s.

Some of my vision:
 

Someone who lives unrushed, with peace and joy in every day

Someone who gives herself permission to think bigger than ever before

Someone who manages her brain with diligence and discipline daily
Someone who loves being different and doesn’t apologize for it

Someone who embraces being a little extra

Someone who’s life is an expression of worship and gratitude

Someone with a high tolerance for risk and failure

Someone who knows that all failure is formative

Someone with high standards

Someone massively in love with life

Someone joyfully committed to her husband

Someone who thinks with optimism and belief

Someone with expansive creativity

Someone willing to do the little things with excellence

Someone committed breaking glass ceilings in her life

Someone who is better friends with her body than she’s ever been

Someone who is an example of what’s possible and invites others in to thinking bigger

What’s YOUR vision?

YOU CAN BE WHOEVER YOU DECIDE TO BE

You are not victim to your past. 

Your past doesn’t dictate your future.

Why not you?

Stop waiting for the gatekeepers in your life – start opening your own gates – or waiting for the Lord to open them (and have the faith that they will at the right time) 

REINVENTING YOURSELF ACTION

Decided exactly what this upgraded version of you looks like.

Get curious about their behaviors, and habits, and thought-patterns.

What would it look like to be someone who walks in the world without insecurity?

What would it be like to be the women who has no jealousy in your relationship?

What would it be like to have 10x the amount in your bank account? 

What would it be like to give someone the benefit of the doubt and assume the best? (Example of the woman who had a hit & run – my disdain and judgement – the need to reconsider)

Truth be Told show on Apple TV 

..”I’d like you to reconsider…”

To reinvent yourself you have to THANK YOUR PAST and present self for the version you are.

-Then get curious about upgrades

-What could be improved?

-What would make this life better?

-How can your approach to life be simplified?

-What have you learned that you needed to experience yourself? (someone couldn’t have just told you) 

Then we PRACTICE BEING OUR FUTURE SELF.

-Try new things on

-Implement new patterns

-Spend time asking her questions

-Experience her success in advance

-Visualize her and her peace and her patterns 

LISTENER OF THE EPISODE:

I want you to know how your podcasts are changing my life.   I want you to know that since listening to you, I am learning that I don’t have to be perfect. I’ve started journaling and am learning who I am, becoming self-compassionate, and I’ve become okay if someone doesn’t like me.  (They just don’t like peppermint. ) 

I retired last year and am excited about who I’m becoming and what God has in store for my future.   It’s going to be a process and will take time to change my inner voice.  I’ve already recommended your podcast to so many people.  God is using you in mighty ways, my friend. Thank you for what you do.  

Mindy

0:01

You're listening to the confidence podcast, your favorite coaching podcast oozing with motivation, inspiration, and confidence to help you boldly take action on your dreams. On your host, Trish Blackwell, internationally recognized Confidence Coach, Best Selling Author and founder of the College of Confidence, the most encouraging place on the internet. I teach go getters in life, how to take your thoughts captive, how to step out of the shadows of self doubt, and how to courageously step into their purpose. With competence. It's time to pump our competence muscles, and train our thoughts, y'all. Let's get started. Hey, there, it's Trish Blackwell, and you're listening to the confidence Podcast, episode 554. We're talking today about reinventing yourself. We're talking about independence and freedom. And the ability to look at your life different than you ever have before and to see yourself now as who you are, but as who you are becoming as the end product, before you even arrive, because that is so much the essence of confidence of knowing who God is transforming you into and being patient along the process. So we're going to be talking about the concept of reinventing. And the idea is to unlock your true potential of who God created you to be. Now to do this, we have to overcome self doubt, we have to create goals, we have to get vision. And we're going to be talking about this whole new chapter of your personal growth two day. And we you can call it reinventing yourself, you can call it the next you, you can call it your future self, you can call it the one point of view versus the 2.0 view, which I often use in my coach coaching. But I just want you to know this is this is part of one of our core pillars of confidence, knowing that your futures amazing knowing your future rocks. And when you think about the reinvention of yourself, the things that you've struggled with in the past, even if it's been for years or decades doesn't have to be the things you'll struggle with in your future, you can make a decision that that will change. So in this episode, we're going to be coaching on deciding who you want to be, no matter your age, becoming the version of yourself that you can be rich really requires something of you it's not just ideation and big dreams, it's doing y'all to be strong, and to do the work, to be a visionary. And to be humble enough to do the little details well in your life, the ones that no one sees the journaling that is only between you and God, the the little details to set you up for success that's going to help you age into the person you want to be all of that behind the scenes stuff. That's the stuff that makes you we're going to talk about some very actionable steps to reinventing yourself. Now, this is a really good topic, if you're about to cross the milestone of a birthday. As many of you know, in I covered it in Episode 547. To celebrate my 40th birthday, we talked about self talk that has changed my life. But I talked a lot about who I want to be as a 40 year old. And so maybe you're about to turn 25 or 60, or you it's a milestone at some point, you had to decide what that next next year looks like, what that next decade, maybe you're transitioning jobs, and you can reinvent yourself and decide who it is you want to be in this next field. And this next job plays in this next group of people, maybe you're switching schools, maybe you're going into a university setting from high school, maybe you're changing teams, you get to decide you get to reinvent yourself, this is not like pretend this is stepping more getting curious about what it is that what has worked for you. And what it is that you were not in congruence. You see, I spent so much of my life pretending to be somebody that I thought people wanted me to be. And when I go through these phases of reinventing myself, I asked myself, What do I know is true? What do I know? It's my god given personality and these traits and these things that are undeniable. And then what is it that I'm I need to clean up a little bit, or that I know that that I'm being pulled in God's saying, let's let's prune you here, right? And so look, I just also chose this topic today because we're talking about reinvention. Because today's day if you're if you live in the United States, that marks independence and freedom and is July 4. Now, I know that this podcast is listened to by over 200 countries around the world. So many of you are not American. As you listen. Don't worry, I'm actually not in America today. I'm recording this as I am in France. And nobody's celebrating it today because it's not the French Independence Day, right? That's July 14. But I can still celebrate something that my country celebrates, even though I'm not right there. independence and freedom doesn't have frontiers. It doesn't have limits. There are no borders, it is available to everyone. Freedom is available, but you have to act. So, before we dive in, I want to just make one brief announcement. And this is the one time of year that I offer this publicly, I offer a lifetime access to the College of competence, which is my core program, my signature program, I coach, and, gosh, we do 10 hours of live coaching. Every single month, I add courses all the time, you can ask me a question anytime get live coaching anytime. And we only make the lifetime upgrade available one time a year. And this is a deal of a lifetime, you can make a one time payment of 2997. You get access to everything I've ever offered, and everything I'll ever offer within the context of the College of competence. If you know you or you want a coach in your corner the rest of the rest of the next few years, for the rest of your life, I have no plans of the college competence going anywhere. Grab this offer, we are offering it this week only. So go to college a confidence.com/lifetime to get access and celebrate the freedom that isn't ahead of your the freedom that is available to you in because when you learn to free your thoughts, when you learn to train your thoughts and you change your thoughts, you change your life. And so I want to start off, where to start this whole reinvention concept by just imagining. My first question is, I these are a couple simple questions. Who do you want to be 10 years from now? And actually think about the year so it's 2023. I want you to think about 2033. If you're a parent, think about how old your children will be at this point. If you are currently dating, think about maybe the the prospect of you having children. Imagine where you're going to be. What do you want that to look like? What do you Who do you want to be? How will you move through the world? What will people who maybe are describing you in passing? How will they describe you? How will they say that you contribute to your community? Next, what contribution will you be making in society when it comes to reinventing and when it comes to transformation. And when it comes to stepping in this next version of who God has called you to be? This is a really great and what there's no right or wrong direction to go with us. Because the world needs a lot of people, billions of people who are helpers who are doers who are leaders. There's no one cause that's more worthy or noteworthy or, or or worthy of praise than another because there is need out there. So maybe you're passionate about foster care children, and maybe you're passionate about about clean drinking water, and third world countries or maybe you're passionate about volunteering with Girl Scouts, the full range, whatever, what is the contribution, I am passionate about setting people's people free. Because I know what it feels like before I learned how to manage my thoughts. I was a prisoner to overwhelm. I was a prisoner to insecurity I was a prisoner to depression and anxiety. And so I am passionate my contribution is to equip millions of people to have spark back in their life that hope in their life to go from just getting through life to being engaged and to living to the fullest. So I'm that's I'm passionate about helping people come alive. That's my contribution. What what is it that that stirs you up? That makes you say yes. So when you think about your future self 10 years now let's just say you've whatever your current hurdles are and your current struggles are, you've overcome those there we are past that. You've conquered whatever the struggle is right now. And you have more time, more time margin, more maturity, more courage, and you're doing big things or you're contributing on the causes that matter to you. What are those? What difference will you be making? I need you to know you are a difference maker. You can make a difference just with kindness. With being an encourager, one of my favorite things to speak over my children as I bless them at night. As your I say this race, you are a difference maker and a world changer. And I know that for a fact. And the more I speak it over them the more they will believe it and know it is a fact and when you know something is a fact about who you are you start stepping in to being that person that God created you to be you start stepping into the facts, even though you don't feel quite prepared. I don't need you to feel prepared. I need you to be courageous.

10:01

and trust where God's calling you trust that there's a need for your trust that there's a world out there who needs help, and needs people to be bright, to be loved to be encouraging to be leaders. And that's why competence matters. Competence equips you to step into what you're called to do. Let's pivot. What do you want your net worth to be? And I'm not trying to make you this all about money. But if you're in a career, and you're trying to grow in your career, and you're thinking about who do I want to reinvent myself? What is my net worth going to be? What is what is i? What is my management of money going to be? What kind of property will my family and I have? How will we contribute financially to our, to the things that matter to us? Are we What does generosity look like? I want you to really, the more you can envision your future self, and the more you can envision what what you see as possible, the more it becomes available to you. If you can imagine it, it becomes available. And another question to help you start this process of imagining as you consider reinvention is what story do you want future generations to tell about you? I think about my my, my grandma Ellen. It's my mom's mom. And she is who my daughter Ellie is named after an Ellen was the most beautiful, Soul kind, and generous and happy go lucky. And wise and simple and profound. She was a librarian for years loved to read. And what are some of the stories I tell there's two ways I think about her she was sweeter than a sugar cookie. And there's also I have dozens and dozens and dozens of memories

11:51

of how she served and loved. We'd all be on the beach at our at our Jersey Shore beach house.

11:59

And grim islands who got up and walked the block to the beach house, and made everyone sandwiches and packed little baggies of snacks and brought up drinks and cut up big juicy Jersey tomatoes and these sandwiches. I mean, I have this vision. So I will I tell my children especially Ellie's and she's named after her. I tell her about her. What are the what are the little things the way I operate in small making sandwiches? The however, how am I generous with my time? How do I love my people? Well, because that's what's going to be told. That's what's going to be talked about. I also admire her because she's she had vision. She and my grandfather grew up in the Depression. And they worked their way through. And even when they didn't have the means she said to him and she did not ask for a lot. But she said I want this beach house. And they saved for years and years and took a risk. And that beach house is blessing us generations and generations down the line because she had the courage to ask her what she wants. And in the 1940s That wasn't a very common thing for women. I think it's extraordinary. That's the kind of story I want you to ask yourself, what do I want? Two generations now from now to say about me? Right. And so as you think now let's let's pivot. What are some more questions and this is the kind of episode you might want to come back, I want you to save it, send to a friend who also likes to journal, and then come back and re listen to this slowly and pause and write these out. That said a lot of these journal prompts that I'm going to share with you to kind of start prompting some vision for you. They are in the show notes, which you can always get at Trish blackwell.com forward slash five, five for the episode number. But first we're going to start with what aspects of my current life or my current self? Do I feel unsatisfied or unfulfilled with? To be honest, what are you ready to drop? What are you? What are you struggling with? Because you're if it's if we're going to reinvent ourselves? We don't we get to leave that you can just decide to be done with that. What are my core beliefs and core values? And how well are they currently aligned with my current lifestyle? How will I align my core values and beliefs with the future that I'm reinventing with the person I'm becoming? And as you consider who you want to become? What are my passions, interests and talents that I haven't fully explored or utilized? What are the biggest fears or limitations holding me back from making significant changes? How do I envision my ideal life or self? And what does success and happiness mean to me? This is the question that really prompted a lot of my growth right when my husband and I met which was Just over ooh, I want to say 12 years ago, we just celebrated our 10th anniversary. I remember being coached and being asked that question, what does an ideal Tuesday look like for you and your dream life like, and it was I wanted to have a relationship and have a have a life that had time to write. My husband loves to write, I love to write. And the dream was to have a productive day, to be engaged and physical and to exercise and, and then also to, to spend afternoons writing, dreaming, talking, writing books together, and being independent in our lives in and where we without having to go into an office. But I remember just even thinking like, it was just felt so radical, and to be like, I could write all afternoon if I wanted. And even if you go, I don't know how I'm going to make that happen. I just want you to give yourself full permission to really answer the question, honestly, what would my ideal life look like? Alright, you heard I'm in France, and this, as I started with the, my ideal life would look like spending afternoons writing with my husband and, and then it became it continued to pivot and shift. And still, some of it is still this writing vision. But But now it includes working from Paris, taking, creating courses based off of where I'm traveling, and, and sharing that with my community. And the more you lean in to just give yourself permission to imagine, the more that becomes possible to you. Next question, what are the key skills or knowledge that I need to acquire or improve upon to achieve my desired reinvention, this is where you have to be honest their self, if you're watching too much TV, and on your screen too much to become the person you want to be? And because right we have to imagine this reinvented this future version of yourself this, this future you and ask us, what are the what is that person's habits? How do they behave? Are they scrolling on their phone all the time? Are they eating mindlessly? Are they accidentally drinking a bottle of wine? Or are they more discipline than I am? What is it that you need to change? In order to support this reinvention? Are there patterns or habits that you need to change or break to reorder, replace in order to support that, that there's the stepping into a new person, because what has gotten you to where you are will not get you necessarily to where you want to go? We have to look at what is required for that next step. Remember, this is a journey. And so a couple other prompts that can help you are there even more simple? Where are you currently dissatisfied? What habits are holding you back? That right there, we could spend a whole episode on, I just want you to jot them down, even just text them to yourself right now. make today the day you say, these habits, these patterns. I'm going to start dissolving them. I'm gonna start changing them. I'm gonna stop saying that's just how I am I going to start doing the work. You can't just dream big. You got to dream big and do the work. And then some general questions. What do you want your relationship with food to be like? What do you want your relationship with your body to be like? What do you want your relationship with time to be like that's one that I'm currently wrestling with. I have the tendency to try to rush things and squeeze too many things in. But I my vision, what I crave the reinvented version of myself the the Trish that I'm becoming she is so abundant in time she is unrushed she is a light hearted she walks with peace and joy. And so every time I get because I now have clarity of who I'm becoming every time I practice that I'm stepping into my future self, I'm stepping into my reinvent itself I'm I'm I'm showing up as the person I want to be and the more you practice showing up as the person you want to be, the more easily become that person. It's how we get better at anything. We just keep practicing it. What do you want your relationship with alcohol or soda to be? What do you want your relationship with money to be like? What do you want your relationship with your family members to be like? And so I encourage you to ask yourself, what is my vision here? I having just turned 40 As I already mentioned, I wrote out some vision. And I have a vision in my 40s and I'm practicing this right now. I'm embracing it. I'm studying it and being curious about about when am I not showing up this way? I'm not being by the way curious, not judging, not critical. I'm being self curious and open. And when I don't show up in these ways, I'm going hmm, I'm I'm getting curious and going why? Why am I still clinging to an old pattern? Right? So here's some of my vision. I'm becoming someone who lives unrushed with peace and joy and every day. I'm becoming someone who gives herself permission to think bigger than ever before. I'm becoming someone who manages our brain with diligence and discipline daily. And becoming someone who loves being different, doesn't apologize for it. I'm becoming someone who embraces being a little extra, I am a little extra stuff I love. I'm extra, and becoming someone whose life is an expression of worship and gratitude, and becoming someone with a high tolerance for risk and failure. And becoming someone who knows that all failure is formative. And becoming someone with consistently high standards. And becoming someone massively in love with like, I'm in love with life, but I'm becoming massively engaged and in love with life. I'm becoming somebody, someone joyfully committed to her husband, and becoming someone who thinks with optimism and belief and becoming somebody with an expansive creativity. Someone willing to do the little things with excellence, and becoming someone committed to breaking glass ceilings in her life and helping others break glass ceilings in theirs. I'm becoming someone who's better friends with her body now than she's ever been. I'm becoming someone who is an example of what's possible and who invites others into thinking bigger and doing the doing the impossible for themselves as well. So my question for you is, what's your vision, and just a sidebar on this concept of gratitude is a gratitude and an abundance are so. So in alignment, if you think about what gratitude is, it's the act of being grateful. And this fullness, fullness is abundance, it is enoughness it overflows and creates Thanksgiving, which creates worship. And this beautiful cycle continues. You get to decide the best news yet is that you get to decide who you want to be.

21:58

Just like we get asked as kids who do you want to be when you grow up? You get to decide what is it that lights you up? What sparks excitement within you? What is it that you would you get to ask yourself like, I can't believe I get to do this. This is so interesting to me, this is so fulfilling. I love the work that I do I love the the life that I get to live, you want not doesn't mean everything's easy. But it means you're engaged in life, it sparks life into you. And remember this you are not a victim to your past your past doesn't dictate your future. Ask yourself to why not you think sometimes we we don't. We want to do these big things. But we think well, I'm just so and so from so and so. And everyone feels like they've got a small town or a small story or a reason. Go back and listen to the unfair advantage episode that we did, which is episode five of the one when life is unfair how to create your own own unfair advantage. Based on the story you tell yourself about whatever your quote unquote, disadvantages in life. Stop waiting for the gatekeepers in your life and start opening your own gates or waiting for the Lord open them which really means is to have the faith and the confidence that they will open at the right time. And stop thinking that you're being excluded, excluded from things you're being protected from things and then the right things will open at the right time. And we don't give up faith, we believe we're going to keep knocking on doors and keep showing up and keep making away. And sometimes the doors will open and sometimes they won't. But we sure as heck aren't waiting waiting to be invited to the table. We invite ourselves we step up, we stepped in we we lead with confidence, we lead ourselves in our own life with confidence by taking action. So what are some some actions that you can take to reinvent yourself? I think that the the the first step is what we really spent most of this episode so far on is deciding exactly what this upgraded version of you looks like, get really curious about that person. 10 years from now, about their behaviors, their habits, imagine what you what it feels like to log into your bank account, and the number is different. So maybe the number has a few extra zeros on it. And that's just the balance you keep in your account. Because it's casual, it's you have an extra, I don't know $50,000 Just very, very casually around available to you flowing in and out. What does that person's how do they dress? What do they tolerate? What are their standards? How do they? How do they what are their social life look like? What is their time with God look like? How do they worship? How do they volunteer? How do they carry themselves? How do they care for themselves? Even these questions will really help. What would it look like to be somebody who walks in the world with that insecurity? What would it look like to be the woman who has no jealousy in your relationship? What would it be and feel like 10 times the amount in your bank account than you currently do? What would it look like to be this to become somebody who gives Every one the benefit of the doubt and assumes the best. You know, I have this one example there's a there's a soccer mom in our group and long story short, I'm going to see this woman. And I only know something of her. And something of her is that my husband was in the parking lot, leaving soccer practice once. And he saw her back out her big SUV and she knocked into another car. So much. So it was such force that her bumper knocked this other person's bumper off. She got out of her car. She looked at the bumper on the ground, she saw that no one she didn't think anybody could see her. She got back in her car, and she drove off. Now my husband, there happens to be a stoplight. My husband was like, oh, no, he ran and he said, Hey, I'm so sorry, I that's not my car. But you can't leave a scene like that. And she's like, Oh, I'm in a rush. And he said, I you know, he got her her name and number. And then found the person who owned the car and said, Hey, I've got this contract. And for you, I've called the police. You know, we're gonna sort this out, she was going to go away without telling you her insurance and getting your bumper fixed. Of course, I'm like, horrified that somebody would be that way. Well, turns out now I see this woman all the time. And everything in me wants to not like her, wants to think poorly of her wants to think, you know, how could you How could you do? How could you hit a car in a parking lot just drive off. But the Trish, who's still grace and love the Trish that I'm reinventing myself into, that's going to assume the best that's going to remind myself and really live from a place assuming that there's more to a story than my than what I know about it. I have this disdain and judgment of her every time I see it. And every time I see I feel it, I'm gonna go, I got some work on my reinvention here, God's got some work in my heart to I am in a place where I'm like, there she is, again, except that her son and my son are going to probably be in soccer for the next few years together. And so it's wonderful when you find examples like this, where you go, wow. There's nothing wrong necessarily with how I'm behaving right now. But is that who I want to continue to be? Do I want to continue to see somebody and feel negatively towards someone I don't. I want to be a walking example of love, and forgiveness, and also humility, right? Because it's pretty. I'm pretty pretty, pretty sure if my own story right, which was related to be my third party from my husband who saw it. There's so much that I don't actually know I don't know her circumstances. I don't know what was happened. I don't know if she was really in a rush. What would it look like to become somebody who always assumes the best? That's, that's my goal. That's what inspires me. You know, I don't know for those of you who have Apple TV, I love the show. Truth be told. If you know the show, you know, it's a show about a podcaster. Of course, I love it. Anyways, Her show is called a her podcast in fictitious podcast is called reconsidered or I think it's that but she always ends every episode with I'd like you to reconsider, right, because she's recounting these things. And that's when I look at that that story I told you about the soccer mom, I'm asking myself to reconsider, I want to reconsider how I think about people how I think about myself, and I want you the reinvention process involves so much of this. It's an invitation to reconsider to reconsider the role of, of God in our life to reconsider the path that we're on to reconsider. The people we hang out with. Because we do become most like the five people we surround ourselves with is that is that current group, congruent with the with the reinvented version that you want to become. The thing is to reinvent yourself, you have to think your past, you've got to think your past and your present self or the version you are because they the who you are now and the things in the decisions good or bad. The Pathways you've you've taken, you know, ideal are not ideal, are what are part of your journey. They are part of your story. We don't deny them. We don't repress them, we accept them. And we thank them, because you walked through lessons that you needed to you received education in life, that you need it. And you can ask yourself, what could be improved? What would make this life better right now? How can I be a better version of me? How can I approach to life be more simplified? And eight? What are those? What are the things that I've learned that I needed to experience myself? Right? There's so much about our present our past that as painful as we want that we wish we could have avoided, we couldn't have avoided because we just weren't going to listen. I have so many areas that God has allowed me to struggle or suffering because I think I had someone just said, Don't do this. I'd be like, Oh, I'm fine. I needed to go through the pain in order to really value the lesson. And the takeaway And then the final thing that we do in the process of reinventing yourself is we practice being our future self, the more you can practice, and now you have a clearer vision, you think your past, you think your present, because your past and your present, show you what you don't want. And they show you what you do, you can keep and nurture, and water and grow more of what you want what you currently have. And you can start intentionally planting the seeds of what you want to grow, and who you want to become. And then that we can identify and weed out the things that we don't want. But the now comes to practicing being our future self. And let's go with what does that look like? Well, it looks like I'm actually recording this, and I'm on my way to soccer. Guess what my thought is going to be? When I see the soccer mom on the thing, I'm gonna find five things to compliment her on. And to be honest, there's a lot. I like her clothes. She's got these twins that are really adorable. And I see her parent with incredible skill, she's incredibly present as a parent. Right? I haven't going to when I see her walk by me eight times, today, I'm going to build her up in my mind. I'm going to work on letting my judgments drop, I'm going to practice being my future self. And so when we do that, it's like trying new things on it's like trying on new clothes. You can implement a new patterns you can be intentional about if you want to break judging thoughts about yourself or others, you you go into the situation with a plan just like I shared with you my and then spend time asking your future self questions. So if your future self is has a massively successful business, and you're sitting here 10 years prior going, how do I get there? You can ask her? I do this often. Hey, Trish, how to how did we figure this out? Often the answer is you just kept going kept believing.

31:59

You can experience the success in advance just like so we're about to come back from France. But I experienced the experience of France for six months prior to going because the planning, there's as much joy in planning a trip for me. And getting to the details. And I start experiencing the joy and the elation and the excitement as much as the actual experience of being there. We're getting ready to plan our next trip. And we're going to Morocco, right and I'm already in I'm already experiencing positive benefits of a trip to Morocco, that hasn't happened. Because I'm spending time experiencing success experiencing Morocco in advance how about studying Moroccan rugs, looking up how to shop looking up the looking at the shops, planning our our desert camping, imagining what it's going to feel like to ride a camel, that in the same way you do that for a trip, whether it's a trip to the beach, a trip to the you know, a mountain cabin, or trip to Disney World, you're experiencing the trip in advance in your mind, we can do the same thing about our success in advance, and about our reinvention of ourselves. So if you want to be more financially abundant and more financial margin, just imagine you might be on a tight budget tighter budget now but imagine in the future, not having to think about purchases, that that will be a reality for you. Now you've got to do the work, money's not just going to magically appear. But I need you to start stepping in to knowing that you're gonna become a person who has financial margin, and financial freedom it's avail as available to you as to anyone else. And so we start to visualize this future version of you and, and also, her their peace. Like I imagined the peace that I am walking with and the patterns and the way I interact. And I imagine what sitting on the porch with my husband five years from now is going to look like when our kids are specific age and what is what is our Wednesday afternoon pattern going to look like, the more you can practice envisioning it, the more you can practice being that person. And then of course practice showing up and and pick one or two new habits or patterns that you're going to start showing up as the new version of you start showing up as 2.0 you and if this idea of 1.0 you and two points of view, oh you excites you, I want to invite you into the college competence, we have some amazing resources and the core of my coaching is the context of this, your before and your after becoming the person and bridging the gap between your 1.0 you version of yourself and the 2.0 version of yourself that you that you know that God has already created you to be but that sometimes you've just gotten in your own way. Whether it's from disengagement, life happening, you know, poor habits. It doesn't even matter why. What matters is that we just don't stay here. And as always with college confidence it comes we are so confident that is the most affordable life coaching on the internet. And we sometimes call it the Netflix of life coaching because there's such a robust library, have workshops and courses that are pre recorded and instant access. Plus, all of the live coaching we do all month long, and the ability to ask me a question anytime you need and get coached and get the resources for it. We are so confident in it being the most well, the most encouraging and effective place on the internet that we it comes when you enroll, it comes with a 14 day money back guarantee, there's nothing no rescue, if it's not the right fit for you just let my team and I know and we swiftly refund your money. And it's month to month cancel at any time. So just you're ready to go and create this next version of you. This 2.0 version of yo you're ready for this reinvention come join us in the COC go to college or competence.com. To get started. We're gonna close out with our listener of the episode. And well, I just Mindy, you're awesome. You just said this, I want you to know how your podcasts are changing my life. I listened to Episode 534 and 537 Loving Food and loving your body and the voice in your head. After listening to the podcast I jokingly asked my daughter, if she had told you about me I felt like you were in my head. I've lived all these years being critical of my mind, or critical my body and beating myself up every time I made a mistake. From the time I can remember my mother made comments about how she thought she was going to have a petite daughter and I'm not petite. And about my weight. I struggled and no matter what I weighed, never felt good enough. I want you to know that since listening to you, I'm learning that I don't have to be perfect. I started journaling and I'm learning who I am becoming self compassionate, and becoming okay. If somebody doesn't like me, they just don't like peppermint. I retired last year and I'm excited about who I'm becoming and what God has in store for my future. It's going to be a process and will take time to change my inner voice. I've already recommended your podcast to so many people God is using you in mighty ways. My friend, thank you for what you do, Mindy, thank you for what you do I condensed your message need to, to just just just to thank you. You're doing the work and this reinvention is well timed. And I love it you already you already have the confidence that God has this incredible journey ahead of you. You guys, it doesn't matter how old you are. Doesn't matter how young you are, your story's not done. The transformation in your life that God is doing is not done. It's a beautiful thing. And when we when we can change our thoughts, miracles happen in the mind is so incredibly powerful. And just being willing, even just listening you might not be maybe if you listen to a couple episodes, and you're like you kind of like some of what I say you don't like some that's okay. I just like that your mind is open. You're open to reconsidering, you're open to questioning your thoughts you're open to maybe thinking maybe the state I'm in isn't permanent. Maybe I'm not always going to struggle, maybe. Maybe I've spent decades of my life thinking a certain way about myself. But just maybe even if you're just in a place of maybe maybe it's possible that I could think differently. Because if I think differently, I will feel differently. And when I feel differently, I act differently. And my friends, that's how our life changes. Y'all. I love you. Hey, happy Fourth of July to my American friends and American listeners. And I will see you guys next week we're talking about appearing more confident. It's gonna be a great episode I will see you then. Please share the show with a friend. If this resonated with you today, share a show forward it to a friend make sure you hit subscribe and we would love for you to leave us a review on iTunes. Go there today, there'll be more of more of who God created you to be to be free. If you loved today's episode of the confidence podcast, I invite you to check out the College of Confidence at www.collegeofconfidence.com. The COC is where your next step is. In the COC we cultivate confidence create courage and spark change. It takes everything we do here on the podcast to the next level and our members get crazy life changing results. I'm so confident that you will find that the COC is the most encouraging place on the internet, and then also wildly exceed your expectations that it comes with a money back guarantee hate joining is completely risk free you owe it to your future self to take your growth to the next level by coaching with me in the COC. Join me today at www.collegeofconfidence.com.

Get started with thought work

Master a Highly Effective Journaling Habit

Download my custom created journal, The Toxic Thought Freedom Journal, and get 7-days of free coaching with me on how to journal with power and effectiveness.

Yes! I Need That