Podcast #492

HOW TO ACCEPT COMPLIMENTS AND HOW TO RECEIVE CRITICISM

When you learn how to accept compliments, you appear confident, humble and open. And yet, most people resist compliments and downplay themselves. It’s time to reprioritize the art of accepting compliments, which in turn, will empower you to be more generous in the compliments you give – to others and to yourself. This podcast will give you 20 practical and humbly confident answers you can say the next time you receive a compliment.

 

In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we’re talking about:

• Why we struggle to accept compliments / why we resist this
• The #1 reason you’re going to want to prioritize working on this skill
• 20 things you can actually say to practice accepting compliments

And some crazy things that our brain does when we are complimented…

 

REVIEW OF THE WEEK

Trish is so relatable yet aspirational. Her nuggets of wisdom are just what I need.

-SierraDawnT

 

WHY DO WE RESIST AND REJECT COMPLIMENTS?

• Embarrassment
• We don’t believe people.
• Comparison to others makes us feel small.
• We’re not comfortable with the attention.
• We are over attached to humility – afraid to be seen.
• Our subconscious thinks it creates more pressure.
• Social anxiety
• General low self-esteems
• Out of the habit of going through life with gratitude
• Cognitive dissonance
• Perfectionistic high expectations and personal dissatisfaction

 

WHY SHOULD YOU WORK ON YOUR SKILL OF ACCEPTING COMPLIMENTS?

It directly impacts your perceived confidence and how you carry yourself.

The more others see you at ease with yourself, the more you will internalize your own interpretation of that as well.

You’ll break some of the patterns of fixed mindset that are keeping you stuck.

 

HOW TO WORK TO BEING OPEN TO COMPLIMENTS

Practice active appreciation

Ground yourself in gratitude

Break perfectionistic tendencies

Downplaying / false humility doesn’t serve anyone

Reframe compliments as little jewels

Practice giving out more compliments – understand their power (when’s the last time you had a good one? How did it change your day? Your sense of self?)

 

20 THINGS YOU CAN SAY TO ACCEPT A COMPLIMENT

1. “Thank you, it makes my day to hear that.”
2. “I really put a lot of thought into this, thank you for noticing.”
3. “Thank you, I really appreciate you taking the time to express that.”
4. “Thank you, I am happy to hear you feel that way!”
5. That’s so kind of you to say, thanks.
6. Thanks, I’m feeling good today.
7. I so appreciate your kind words, thanks.
8. Gosh, that’s so nice of you to say, thank you.
9. Thank you.
10. Yeah, I love it too, thanks.
11. Thank you – I am so grateful for this opportunity.
12. “Thanks so much- I love how (insert another personality trait) you are too.”
13. “Thanks- that’s nice of you to say.” 
14. “I appreciate you saying that.” 
15. “That’s nice to hear.” 
16. “That’s very sweet.”
17. “I so appreciate you saying that – that was so sweet of you!”
18. “Thanks – you made my day.”
19. “Thank you so much, I really appreciate hearing that from you.” 
20. “That means a lot coming from you.” 
21. “Your opinion really matters to me, so that’s really nice to hear.”

 

HOW TO RECEIVE CRITICISM

• Change the label. It’s constructive feedback.
• Look for the truth.
• Acknowledge what’s unnecessary / what can be looked past.
• Take ownership of what is true and what you want to change.
• Don’t dramatize it.
• Decide to be someone who doesn’t take offense easily.

Criticism is just an opinion.

Allow people to have opinions.

Don’t be so alarmed.

What happens when we are criticized:

-We feel shame / embarrassment

-We go to a place of self-righteousness, alarm and pride

-We puff up and react (through inaction, over-reaction or behind-your-back action)

-We victimize ourselves

 

OTHER EPISODES YOU WILL ENJOY

#483: (Feb 2022): Self-Validation: The Art of Not Needing Other People to Tell You “Good Job”

#481 (Feb 2022): Enoughness: How to Feel Enough and Increase Your Self-Worth

OTHER RESOURCES YOU WILL ENJOY

Forbes Article: How to Appear More Confident Than You Feel for When it Counts the Most

https://www.forbes.com/sites/forbescoachescouncil/2022/04/15/how-to-appear-more-confident-than-you-feel-for-when-it-counts-the-most/?sh=21a8c3a45397

SNEAK PEEK TO NEXT WEEK:

If you’ve ever downplayed yourself, or minimized an achievement, or perhaps feel like you’re playing small with the real potential that you know God has placed inside of you, then this podcast episode is for you. This coaching podcast explores how break this self-sabotaging and self-critical habit that’s not only making you feel “not enough,” but is keeping you from showing up fully and shining brightly with your life.

 

LISTENER OF THE EPISODE:

Hi trish! I just wanted to thank you for your most recent podcast. I have certainly learned a lot since I first found your podcast but I’m definitely not where I want to be. So naturally there is some negative self talk. This podcast just reassured me that being hard on myself Is a choice and I have the power to choose not to. Thanks for reminding me that I am great, during every step of the journey:))

Aisha