Podcast #465

Being Yourself When You Feel Disconnected from Others

 

In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we’re talking about….

1. What to do when you feel like you don’t belong, and you’re not happy alone and not comfortable around people.
2. How to connect when you feel unable to connect or connecting feels flat or insincere and unfulfilling
3. Managing the fear of being misunderstood and hesitation in wanting to speak up, post or have a voice out of fear that good intentions might be misconstrued

 

REVIEW OF THE WEEK:

I am so excited to writing this review. I have listened to a lot of podcasts…but this one takes the cake for me. Not only does it provide me with positive and encouragement, but it is so relatable to my life experiences, and genuinely brings me closer to God. Trish is so personal and connects with every path of life that you could be headed down. She encourages you to take that step back to really focus on your life and the goals you have for yourself, and gives you the tools to make it what you’ve always imagined it to be. Thank you Trish for your guidance and continuous support. I’m so blessed by and grateful for you and this podcast. My path has never been so clear.

 

BE LIKED WORKSHOP

If you want to learn how to like yourself, and how to be more liked, then you need to grab instant access to my newest masterclass, How to Be More Liked.

Get access immediately today at www.trishblackwell.com/beliked

 

WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE YOU DON’T BELONG

Learn how to be by yourself, and what the normal amount of down time is by yourself.

Know what your head says to yourself when you’re lonely.

Mine says:

You don’t matter.

No one cares about you.

What you do doesn’t matter.

You’re alone.

Nothing matters.

Everyone else is doing something interesting.

1. Recognize the lies.
2. Learn to like spending time with yourself.
3. Normalize boredom.
4. Admit that you’re lonely, but know you’re not alone; it’s not just you.
5. Write down positive memories or gratitude.
6. Intentionally pursue connection with others- people or animals, known or unknown.
7. Create a schedule, including a bedtime. (Sadness amplifies at night)

It’s harder to feel alone when you have a plan and a purpose.

 

HOW TO CONNECT WHEN YOU FEEL UNABLE TO CONNECT

…Or connecting feels flat and insincere and unfulfilling

Take away the vanity metrics of superficial and insincere relationships and connections on social media.

Every connection you have is gold – don’t downplay connection you do have because that person “is supposed to like you or help you”

Connection is vulnerable.

But you are brave, and open.

You are willing to be seen, and if you are, you will be able to connect.

But to be willing to be seen you have know that you are enough.

You are worthy of being seen.

Your story is interesting and matters.

Your hobbies and likes are not random, or boring.

Connection takes time, and practice.

It’s created tiny moment at a time.

Practice with strangers, where there’s no risk.

Give a compliment.

Start up a conversation.

Go out of your way.

Get curious.

Connection comes from curiosity and conversation.

 

MANAGING THE FEAR OF BEING MISUNDERSTOOD

Being misunderstood doesn’t mean that you don’t belong.

We crave understanding.

“I believe you have to be willing to be misunderstood if you’re going to innovate.” -Jeff Bezos

Left unchecked, the fear of being misunderstood will:

Stop you from being you

Slow down your creativity

Create overthinking and overwhelm, making you stuck in your own head

Prevent you from creating connection with others

Put blocks in your exploration of new ideas or thoughts

1. Adjust your expectations.
2. Decide how you want to define and understand yourself.
3. Recognize your own place in the world and how you contribute.
4. Be open to mistakes, failures and embarrassment as neutral experiences
5. Acknowledge your vulnerability and embrace it

 

HOW TO HAVE A VOICE IN A WORLD THAT MIGHT USE IT AGAINST YOU

Pause and be present with what you believe.

Seek to be open to understanding the opinions and view points of others.

Know that them more you seek to understand, the more you will also be understood.

Practice speaking boldly and confidently to yourself.

Be mindful of defensiveness or closed off, negative reactions that might be creating barriers.

Tell others, I want to understand….

Or ask, What did you really mean…

 

PATREON UPDATE

Announcing a new level of support for the podcast!

Hop over to my Patreon page for all of the options, including a new $7 /month support option that delivers Weekly Journaling Prompts.

Go to www.trishblackwell.com/patreon to get started

 

LISTENER OF THE EPISODE:

“Let’s just see what’s possible.”✨

This is a statement I tell my clients all the time.👈🏻

I love it because it opens up possibilities they didn’t previously think were available to them.

And that’s where the magic ✨ happens.

My clients learn to be confident enough and bold enough to just go after what they really want … and the results speak for themselves!

Just this week alone I’m celebrating…🎉🎉🎉

One client who increased her monthly revenue by 50%. (!!!!)

One client who hit 6-figures for the first time. (!!!!)

One client who got a job offer at a salary 30% higher than she ever thought possible. (!!!!)

I mean. Ya’ll. Champagne moments all around.🍾

And it’s all because we decided to say, “let’s just see what’s possible.”

How about you? What might happen in your future if you just go for it, starting today, to “just see what’s possible?!!”  (BTW if you’re ready to take the limits off your life and you really want to see what’s possible, DM me to get on my waiting list for my 1:1 coaching).