Podcast #457

How to Give Yourself Approval and Believe You’re Good Enough

Not feeling good “enough” and always needing the affirmation, approval or acceptance of others can severely limit your ability to tap into your fullest potential and greatest amount of joy in life. This coaching explores how to give yourself approval, believe you’re enough and trust your own decisions, even if you’ve struggled in the past with being a people-pleaser or with thriving on words of affirmation or on someone else telling you what to do.

In this episode of The Confidence Podcast, we’re talking about:

  1. How to break over-attachment to other people’s affirmations, approvals and opinions, even if you’re a words-of-affirmation-love-language-person
  2. Learning how to give yourself approval, trust yourself and be your own voice of encouragement … how to know you’re on the right path when the path isn’t visible or laid out by someone else
  3. A list of affirmations you can use to speak life into yourself – the ones that will help you believe you are good enough and that will help you trust your own voice, intuition and innate, God-given potential

 

REVIEW OF THE WEEK

Awesome podcast – 5 stars

Trish’s calming voice, relatable storytelling and spot-on advice has been SO helpful for me. I just started a new job within my company and the confidence and stop caring what people think specific episodes have been really beneficial to me. I love that she has so many episodes that I can glance through and take what I need for the day.

-SageSC

 

LET’S COACH!

The path is unknown.

Even if you think it’s obvious for others, it never really is.

The acceptance of the unknown is an acceptance of our humanity.

It invites us into a life of faith, and confidence.

It challenges us to think with belief and active mental management.

We grow up in a very directional, progression-based environment. You complete first grade, you move to second grade. You advance your skill set in a sport, and you progress to the next level of mastery, training or competition. You graduate high school, and you move onto college.

And in many ways, this structure is excellence.

But in some ways, it handicaps our confidence in our own choices.

You have a path unique to you.

You get to learn how to trust the direction you choose to go.

Whichever direction I take, it will be awesome.

 

OVER-ATTACHMENT TO PEOPLE’S AFFIRMATION

I needed applause, affirmation – but this belief limited my full growth, my access to impenetrable peace and real freedom.

It’s okay to be a words-of-affirmation person, and feel loved by compliments and affirmation; we all need that to some extent … but, we also have power when we learn how to give it to ourselves.

If you wait for others, then you’ll get stuck in the performance/pressure cycle…or people-pleasing, and you’ll get the affirmation you crave, but perhaps not for an area of life you want or care about.

Overly relying on other people’s validation or direction removes you from your own natural ability to trust your own judgment.

 

GIVING YOURSELF APPROVAL

Yep, good job, me.

Yes, that’s a good decision.

Yes, I’ve got this.

Sure, I can probably figure that out.

Absolutely, I’m growing and on my way.

We do this as young children, and so why did it lose it’s luster?

We shout “I did it!” or “I can do it!” and yet we outgrow that as adults?

It became uncool at some point.

But what’s more uncool than that, is the self-doubt that suffocates the real you from shining. The desperate need we all have within, hoping we are accepted, loved and noticed.

You don’t have to wait for someone to notice you, you can notice yourself.

When you decide to think that you are amazing, you’ll feel amazing.

When you feel amazing, you’ll carry yourself amazingly.

And when you carry yourself amazingly, people notice.

 

TRUSTING YOURSELF

Make a choice and stick with your choice.

It’s less important if your choice was a good one, or the best one, and more important that you have your own back and hold to the decision you’ve made.

Repeatedly committing to yourself and your choices is a sure way of proving to yourself that you can do it.

Don’t ask others for permission or for their opinion.

Practice thinking on yourself.

This will remove you from the habit of regularly relying on others to validate you, which prevents you from trusting your own judgement.

 

BEING YOUR OWN VOICE OF ENCOURAGEMENT

Practice being a friend to yourself.

The better you get at self-affirming, the more free you will be to pursue anything in your life that really matters to you.

You’ll increase your sense of self-trust because you’ll learn over time that your inner voice is looking out for you, and is trustworthy.

This is the process of having your own back.

When you know that you have your own back, and that God is with you, you never have to wallow or waver in anxiety ever again.

Belief in your competencies, and in the effectiveness of your coaching and training will take you a long, long way. 

 

AFFIRMATIONS FOR SELF-APPROVAL

I’m going a great job.

I give myself permission to do what is right for me.

What I love about myself is my ability to ____________.

I give myself space to grow and learn.

I allow myself to be who I am without judgment.

I listen to my intuition and trust my inner guide.

I am always headed in the right direction because I am always growing.

My mind is full of brilliant ideas.

I trust myself to make the right decision.

I am at peace with who I am as a person because I trust how God made me.

I make a difference in the world because I put love into it.

My soul radiates from the inside and warms the souls of others.

Note to self: what I do today will make me proud tomorrow.

I am healing and strengthening every day.

I can do hard things.

I am not defined by my past, I am refined by it and driven by my future.

I am living with abundance.

I’m on my way.

I’m allowed to take my foot off the gas and I give myself rest.

I am victorious because I refuse to sit in defeat or wallow in discouragement. I know those feelings are part of life and I allow them to pass through me without derailing me from confidence, courage and continuation towards what matters to me.

 

ANNOUNCEMENTS:

3 more weeks to get in on the bonus bundles with my newest book Straighten Your Crown.

  1. 1 pre-order copy gets you a copy of the audiobook for FREE
  2. 3+ pre-ordered copies gets you an invite to my upcoming EXCLUSIVE “Worthiness Workshop”

 

A Workshop on How to Live With Unshakeable Confidence.

On September 22nd, I’m teaching a live virtual workshop day where I’ll show you exactly how to walk in worthiness like a confident daughter of the King. 

Walk in Worthiness is an experience created to ground your identity securely as God’s daughter. You’ll learn how to think with godly confidence, how to listen to the whispers of God on your life and how to engage your faith bravely in how you live. The workshop experience will provide you with the tools to stand firm in your worth and how to express the overflow of abundant love that flows through your life

 

LISTENER OF THE EPISODE:

Erin, my hairdresser! “I can feel you smiling when you talk, like it’s coming through the podcast.”

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