Trish Blackwell

Coaching your confidence and courage to that you finish what you start and contribute to the world in a way that matters.

#453: Why You’re Not Doing What You Want to Do

By on in Anxiety and Stress Management, Podcasts, Self-Confidence and Happiness, Self-Doubt and Belief, Self-Sabotage and Habit Change, Social Anxiety and People Pleasing, The Confidence Podcast

 

Podcast #453

Why You’re Not Doing What You Want to Do

Not doing what you say you want to do is one of the most frustrating patterns that is easy to fall into and will perpetuate low self-esteem and stagnancy. Be kind to yourself though! This isn’t an issue of lacking discipline, laziness or not caring – it’s a belief issue, and in this episode of The Confidence Podcast you’ll learn exactly what you can do to break the cycle. It’s time to be a person of absolute self-integrity who always keeps their promises to themselves.

In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we’re talking about:

  • The 3 main reasons keeping you stuck and holding you back and resulting in your feeling like you’re a person who doesn’t do what you want to to
  • How to really decide and commit to doing what you say you want to do
  • 5 things you can do right now to start being someone who does what they say they’re going to do

 

REVIEW OF THE WEEK:

Pixelover4487
 
Hiii – 5 stars
 
I’m loving this podcast and I’m a guy. I struggle with anxiety and no confidence and I can’t stop listening. Thank youuuuuuu. 

 

WHY NOT DOING WHAT YOU WANT TO DO IS TOXIC

It breaks your integrity with yourself.
It creates an atmosphere of self-doubt and hesitation.
It imposes self-limitations that actually don’t exist.
It convinces you that things are harder to achieve than they actually are.
It sabotages your confidence and courage.
It discourages you and disappoints your self-concept.
It invites you to play small and justifies a “I can’t help it” victim mentality 

 

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YOU HAVEN’T REALLY DECIDED TO DO IT

Sure, you think you have.
But deciding to do something means that you’re committed completely – anticipating the challenges, the resistance, the times when you aren’t going to feel like it.
You haven’t created a plan for the days when it sucks.
 
You can commit to self-doubt, or you can commit to your goal – you can’t do both.
The emotion of confusion is keeping you in doubt. 

 

YOU DON’T REALLY BELIEVE YOU CAN DO IT

You’re burdened and bogged down by the evidence of the past and you’re misinterpreting it. Instead of seeing it as an example of how not to do it, or a way you have grown and learned doesn’t work, you see it as a limitation and prediction of what is possible in the future. 

“It’s never worked out before” is the one thought that keeps us from our potential. It drags our past into our present unnecessarily

Everything in the future should be something you’ve never done in the past

It’s time to create and foster new belief.

Belief creation comes from intentional thought creation.
I have a course on this in the College of Confidence, but for now, here’s what you need to know:

  1. Decide what you want to believe.
  2. Write down a thought – or list of thoughts – that bridge the way to that belief.
  3. Repeat these daily.
  4. Catch and substitute every thought that doesn’t align with your new belief.
  5. Track the evidence of how you are changing on the inside out. 

 

YOU HAVE CONVINCED YOURSELF IT WILL BE TOO HARD

And therefore it doesn’t feel worth the effort.
 
It’s not too hard.
You can achieve anything, with ease and focus if you think about it with a controlled mind.
 
Yes, in some ways it’s hard, but it’s also hard to live a life with broken dreams, watching others do what you could have done. It’s hard to settle. (It’s easy too). 
 
Hard is just a thought.
 
The Hard Thought Pyradmid
 
I can do hard things.
I am good at doing hard things.
I like doing hard things.
I go after doing hard things.
 
You get up the ladder when you realize “hard” is just a thought and an intrepreation.
I have learned to substitute “hard” with other words like: challenge, focus, commitment, discipline, boredom, next-level.
 
I love being the type of person who does what most people are unwilling to do.
And what I do that’s different really isn’t all that hard. 
I’m merely just willing to do a little bit more, with a good attitude.
It’s my attitude that preserves me, protects me and pushes me.
I fight off self-pity like a full-time job.
 

 

5 WAYS TO BECOME SOMEONE WHO DOES WHAT THEY SAY THEY’RE DOING TO DO

  1. Make it your new identity
  2. Take ownership / stop blaming
  3. The confidence formula
  4. Create new beliefs
  5. Have a new standard of excellence

LISTENER OF THE WEEK:

Dude. 
My coach Preston Pugmire mentioned your podcast so I found your show and checked it out, then listened to like 6 episodes in a row. Your story is incredible, and, being very similar to mine, is nothing short of God’s Divine Providence. After having a baby in the beginning of a pandemic and being isolate for months while managing PPD and a 4 year old daughter as she adjusted to having a baby brother and not having friends or school or church, my mind was  mush. It took until this month to start intentionally getting my mind centered, and your podcast really kicked it into gear. Thank you for what you do. You are a blessing.
-Breanna B.