Podcast #450

How to Stop Feeling Awful About Yourself

Beating yourself up, or indulging in the emotion of feeling awful about yourself, when you’re not where you want to be isn’t effective. It’s not a helpful thought pattern, and yet, we find ourselves in places of despair. Despair drives us to desperation, depression and disillusionment. It morphs our ability to see where we are, how well we are actually doing, and intimidates us on how far we have to yet go. This podcast episode covers how to break the cycle of self-criticism so that you can start feeling encouraged, hopeful and like you like who you are again. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/450

In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we’re talking about:

·       Indulgent emotions, and how to know when you need to really take control of them (and how to do just that)

·       A 3-step, simple process to help you stop feeling awful about yourself, whatever the situation is

·       How to stop believing that you’re stuck or will always feel this way … and some specific thought substitution examples for you to try on in your own brain



Awesomeness – 5 stars

Hooked oof of the first episode I heard on self-criticism! Felt like she knew me personally … and she’s faith based!!! 




Indulgent emotions are emotions that keep you stagnating in a place of self-pity and powerlessness. 

For me, these emotions were 


-disappointment (most notably in myself)

-disgust (most notably about my body)

-hopelessness (most notably about my progress)


Recognize that you are in power.

You are choosing to indulge your toddler, dramatic brain.

The more you indulge it, the more convincing, and a monster it becomes. 

Put the toddler in the corner.

Remember that you have a bigger perspective than the thought.

Decide to not give into the dramatization or catastrophizing … and that all of the narratives you have created about what other people are thinking about you are just not happening. 



I’ve been in places of awfulness.

1.     Body dysmorphia, insecurity and eating disorder.

2.     Financial rock bottom and hopelessness / powerlessness 

3.     Hustle mindset and entrepreneurial comparison.

Most importantly: stand firm against the pitiful thought … “I’m stuck”. 

How to Not Believe You’re Stuck?

Believe in the compound effect.

Take your thought management seriously.

Credit yourself for the new tools you have.

Acknowledge your dissatisfaction with stagnancy.

Remember you can create anything.

Success leaves clues – keep yourself inspired. 

Take your commitments and plans with yourself seriously – be of integrity. 



Is there something interfering with your happiness? Have you been wanting to start counseling, but not know where to look or start? 

BetterHelp will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist. You get to connect in a safe and private online environment – it’s so convenient, and of course confidential. Once you sign up you can start communicating in under 24-hours. Y’all, this isn’t self-help, this is professional counseling.

What I love about it the most is that you can send a message to your counselor at anytime. You’ll get timely and thoughtful responses plus you can schedule weekly video or phone session.  

Betterhelp makes it easy and free to change counselors if needed. It’s more affordable than traditional offline counseling and financial aid is available.

Their licensed professional counselors specialize in depression, anxiety, stress, relationships, sleeping, trauma, anger, family conflict, grief, and self-esteem. I want you to start living a happier life today. As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting www.betterhelp.com/confidencepod





3-Step Process:

1.     Be very specific about exactly what you are thinking. Write it down.

2.     Decide what thought would be better instead. Write it down.

3.     Repeat, repeat, repeat. 

Remember, our thoughts create our results, and that feeling of “awfulness” is not a permanent state, even though it “feels” like it will be. It is only permanent if you allow it to be. Your mind is not overwhelmed or crazy, it’s just cluttered and mismanaged. When you allow toddler thoughts to run wild, you’ll get toddler results. 

Thought Substitutions re: Body:

I appreciate body for all that it has done, specifically…

I have decided that I will be friends with my body, so today I will choose kind words.

I believe that everything I am doing is working even when I can’t see it.

I am patient and in this for the long run because my body is my friend for life.

I will motivate myself with kindness, not criticism. 

I am making decisions today that are moving my body towards the version of it I want it to be tomorrow. I trust the little things I can’t see happening will pay off and are building up.

I am a badass and my body has created human life – I will be patient with it as it heals, recovers and rebuilds itself to its happy and ideal weight.

I am losing weight in an easy and relaxed manner, healthy and positive way. 

I am patient and I am on my way. 

Thought Substitutions re: Business:

Everything is working according to plan and I am where I need to be. 

I appreciate learning what doesn’t work as much as I appreciate learning what does.

I am creating success and am patient with the process.

I like the person I am becoming because of the challenges I am going through.



Sneak Peek for Upcoming Episodes:

Black and White Thinking #451

Physical Intimacy Confidence #452

Why You’re Not Doing What You Want to Do #453 



Lucy from IG.

I found your podcast recently and have been listening to it. Finding it helpful to keep my spirits up as I venture into changing my career and applying for a new job currently.

Make sure you check out episode #447: Career Confidence How to Have More of It, No Matter What Type of Work You Do (www.trishblackwell.com/447)

Also, I have a fabulous YouTube video 

How to Overcome Interview Nerves and Get Your Dream Job:

How to Overcome Interview Nerves and Get Your DREAM Job!

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