In this episode of The Confidence Podcast
Approval addiction, or affirmation addiction, is rampant and a debilitating pattern to allow dominate in your heart. You don’t have to always be stuck in this addictive, often negative and powerless place. You can learn to be free from the need to earn approval, get permission or be affirmed by others to feel like you’re “enough.” Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/378
FIRST OFF, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BEAUTIFUL 5-YEAR-OLD ELLIE!!!!
Love this podcast so far – 5 stars by _m4ggie
Her words are super encouraging and a delight to listen to
Ya’ll, in life, the best advice I was ever given, is to ask for what you want.
You only get in life what you have the courage to ask for.
So I am having the courage to ask you to leave me some love.
It’s the belief that it’s possible to please everyone.
It creates a self-imposed prison
It’s both people-pleasing and performing to impress.
-Wanting to be liked by everyone
-Wanting to be the absolute best at anything I did
-Wanting to be favored by teachers and employers
-Wanting to be in all social groups
-Wanting to be as successful as possible
-Wanting to be stand out physically – and hiding when I didn’t feel that way
-Wanting to be built up by my parents in ways they weren’t wired to be
-Wanting to date only the most attractive and popular people
-Wanting to appear like I had it all together
-Wanting to create the image of a perfect life (being more interested in appearing to have a perfect life than living one)
Lack of achievement
Lack of personal fulfillment
Increased stress and anxiety
Overcommitment of schedule
Changing your position because other people don’t agree or approve
Giving compliments to gain attention
Getting upset if someone disagrees with you
Agreeing when you don’t really agree
Losing your voice and not giving your true opinion
Doing what you don’t want to do because you can’t say no
Failing to complain or communicate over wrongdoing
Spreading or participating in gossip
Asking permission or waiting for someone to tell you that you are qualified
Pretending to be an authority on everything
Today’s podcast episode is sponsored by Ariel Selwyn’s upcoming new book, Though the Mountains Be Shaken.
You can find out more about Ariel and her work at: www.arielselwyn.com
You can find her book, Though the Mountains Be Shaken on Amazon or iTunes. COMING SOON FOR PRE-ORDER ON AMAZON. Check back for link to be updated!
What is the book about?
First, acknowledge the addictive behavior.
Then, after those things, most importantly, TAKE ACTION.
There’s a reason I call my clients “action takers”.
If you can embody this forward momentum mindset, you will push past the barriers of needing permission or affirmation from others to move through yourself.
Insecure = in secure = not secure.
Disease = dis – ease = not at ease or peace.
Confidence is a deep feeling of security and safety.
What I blamed on disease and on a type of personality was actually just a lack of peace in my life. Peace was a misplaced value on what mattered and what didn’t – on what would bring me real fulfillment and what wouldn’t.
Where will you find your peace?
Does your relationship with pressure serve you or harm you?
What matters more, success or significance?
Will you stop partnering with a spirit of desperation, lack, and fear?
The Confidence Podcast is almost seven years old and in that time we’ve mobilized a movement of confidence across the world. It has been my greatest honor to have the privilege of being a voice of encouragement in your life. With hundreds of hours of free coaching available with just the click of an episode, The Confidence Podcast has sown confidence and courage into over 2 million people’s lives.
If you’re considering becoming a patron to the show, I just want you to know that I couldn’t be more grateful for the investment you would be making into this message. Because of you, we are going to be able to reach more listeners, and one life by one life, help change the world into a more confident, caring and loving place. Your $5 support will not only help me cover the financial cost of producing the show (hosting fees, website costs, etc.) – and my time invested in creating it but also to reach more future listeners; not to mention that you’ll get those 2 bonus exclusive-to-patron-supporters monthly episodes.
You can get started at www.patreon.com/TheConfidencePodcast
The launch of Patreon Partners is a celebration of how our community has grown, and a way that we can offer our most loyal listeners a real community and extra resources for just pennies a day.
Therefore we want to make this Patreon Partner community as simple as possible while obviously providing significant value in return for your support. As such, we are offering one tier at a set support amount of $5. And for that patreon support, you get the following:
Final word: Asking you for money is something we take very seriously. We know it’s no small thing to commit your financial resources to something like a podcast and we deeply respect even your consideration of such a thing. But know that our commitment to you and this community is always to pursue a return on investment that greatly exceeds $5 each month.
Podcasts that Patrons will get this month?
Trish, my name is Perrine – I live in the UK, I am a full-time marketing director of a software company and have two young kids. Your podcast has been a huge help in getting me more confident and believing that God brought me here for a purpose. You make me strong and better. Thank you for existing and for fulfilling your purpose in the universe. You are a fantastic human being.