HOW TO RUN YOUR OWN RACE
In this week’s episode we’re chatting about:
- How, after decades of not running my own race, I’ve learned to change the way I think
- Why running your own race can be such a challenge in our day and age – why we are so susceptible to getting pulled into the trap of comparison
- 5 strategic ways to really start running your own race
Just a quick hello to all of my Keep the Faith listeners out there – thanks for being part of the community of contagious encouragement.
I am proud to be an educator and consultant for Beautycounter, a B-Corp company on a mission to get safer products into the hands of everyone. The lack of regulation in the personal care and cosmetic industry is astounding and it is harming our health in very serious ways. We need more voices to join up on our mission. If you want to put your passion to purpose while being generously compensated, then I would love to start a conversation with you about what it means to be involved in the #saferbeauty tribe that is Beautycounter.
Join the movement of #betterbeauty and message me via email to make your voice really resonate for a cause.
HOW I STRUGGLED TO RUN MY OWN RACE / THE RESULTS:
I struggled for years to run my own race, literally and metaphorically. I self-sabotaged my athletic performance in the pool at swim meets the year I started becoming preoccupied with the competition. Prior to that date I approached the blocks for each race with confidence about myself. I acknowledged my competitors, but never took them into consideration during the race. After that date, my race routine rotated around what the other girls were or were not doing. I watched how long they warmed up in the warm-up pool, I noticed if they stretched before the race and I kept them in my peripheral vision in the water during the race itself. I had a reputation to maintain – one of being fast – so I wanted to make sure I always knew where the other girls were who were trying to catch me. The problem is that in watching what was going on in their lanes I lost sight of my own lane. Before I knew it I was no longer the one to beat. In trying to swim everyone else’s races I lost my own.
- Compromised athletic performance and career
- Decade-long eating disorder and anxiety
- Two years engaged in toxic, abusive relationship because of status
- Limited dreams and goals and three years wasted partying and just trying to fit in
- Pressure and narcissistic desire to prove my worth by being better than others and ensued anxiety when I failed to measure up and when I realized that there would always be someone better, smarter, richer, prettiers
WHY RUNNING YOUR OWN RACE CAN BE TOUGH:
Culturally we are raised to compare ourselves to one another. We compare grades, clothes, successes, ideas, and experiences.
We have learned to use comparison as a coping mechanism. Somewhere along the way, we learned that comparing ourselves to someone else – putting that person down in comparison to ourselves – was a way to boost our self-esteem and to feel better about ourselves.
It’s hard to trust yourself. Even though we all know the story of the tortoise and the hare, we don’t internalize it well; we are always worried about where we are in life in approximation to our age and to others who are in our age bracket. Additionally, we are all familiar with the adage that we are meant to run our own races, the problem is that we don’t trust ourselves enough to know if the path we are walking, or racing along, is actually the path that we are meant to be traveling.
5 WAYS TO / HOW TO RUN YOUR OWN RACE – DAILY:
Don’t beat yourself up. Know that being tempted to look around and compare yourself to others is always going to be a part of your brain chemistry and tendencies; don’t be surprised when tempted to engage in comparison thoughts.
Have a morning mantra that reminds you of your truth and purpose.
Be aware of your vocabulary (example: she (actor) is prettier than her (actor) … am I setting myself up to judge and compare even in the ways I might passively speak about actors on TV shows I watch?)
Know your uniqueness. Remind yourself daily that God has a plan created only for you that only you can walk out.
Have more fun. (story of Moe saying “Have fun today!” instead of “have a good day!”)
LISTENER OF THE EPISODE:
Thank you so much for sending the guidebook! I can’t believe I actually got a live response via e-mail that’s impressive!! I have to tell you…
I absolutely love your show and everything you stand for! It’s helped me so much to get through the slump I’ve been experiencing the last few weeks of the new year. I’ve found new motivation to do better within all aspects of my life and it started about two weeks ago when I was driving from Arizona back to Utah. Your show inspired me and created a desire to do better!
I think the best thing about your show is the honest information you provide to people. You don’t sugar coat anything and that’s something I greatly appreciate! You tell it like it is while also providing encouragement and uplifting insights that make the hard truth a little easier to hear … and there are so many of us who need to hear it!
I’ve enjoyed the chance to have a positive thought each day. I’ve started at the beginning of your show and I’ve been listening to the messages and topics you’ve shared for the last few years. It’s so fun to see your growth and development as a podcast-er and coach.
Thank you for having such a strong talent for teaching self-improvement and confidence! You’re truly making a difference in the world through one listener at a time.
If you love me, you will write a review for my book! J
Also, to go with my book, I’ve created a FREE 5-Day Detox Devotional to prepare your heart and soul to get the most out of Insecurity Detox once it arrives. Over a period of five days, you will receive five-minute devotional and prayer-centered posts right to your inbox to inspire joy, infuse you with confidence and deepen your understanding of the truth of just how deeply God loves you. Get your free copy of the Detox Devotional by visiting www.trishblackwell.com/devotional