HOW TO STOP OVERANALYZING YOUR PARENTING
You know your life has changed when going to the grocery store by yourself is a vacation.
WHY DO WE OVERANALYZE?
We overanalyze because we self-doubt.
We overanalyze because we fear that we aren’t enough.
We overanalyze because we compare.
We overanalyze because we lack trust and confidence in our capabilities.
HOW CAN WE STOP OVERANALYZING SO MUCH?
There are five simple framing shifts that we need to do mentally in order to stop the habit of overanalyzing. Summed up, these are confidence markers and the stronger our innate self-confidence and understanding of our self-worth is, the stronger we will be in holding to our ability to trust these truths.
- Trust your gut.
- Trust your capabilities.
- Trust your love.
- Trust your falability – know that you aren’t perfect and won’t ever be, nor do you need to be.
- Trust God’s design – you are perfectly matched with your child for a reason. When you think back on your parents, whatever your relationship might be or have been with them, there was a reason they were your parents. God could have put your child in the lives of any number of people or families, but He chose you.
It’s important to know and remember that we will make mistakes, that we will fail our children and that we will have things we need to learn along the way – but the mark of truly successful parenting is not displayed through the accomplishments of your child, whether or not your family looks like it’s walked out of a J.Crew catalogue or whether you look like a good parent – the mark of great parenting are children who have hearts overflowing with love and kindness for others. I really believe that if we live with kindness as our compass, then our compassion and love for others will power us to follow our dreams and purposes and to be successful and contributing members to society at large…ultimately making the world a better place. And isn’t that what we desire as parents? For our children to live with happiness and to live in a world that is better than the world in which we abide? We can do and accomplish this by making our children’s character the most important focus of our parenting.
- Write down your mission statement as a parent.
- Journal about your anxieties and then let them go and give them to God.
- Give yourself permission to relax
- Ask yourself when will enough ever be enough (the answer is that it won’t, so instead of stressing about every decision you make and everything your children do, just walk through life with confidence to know that as long as you are doing everything with love as your motivator, then you will be walking a walk of beauty and grace).
- Start a praise notebook at night – write down one thing you did well as a parent that day, one thing that you learned about or through parenting that day for which you are grateful, and one thing you absolutely love about the gift it is to be a parent.
Moms with daughters, this announcement is for you, and it’s something, since I’m the mother of a daughter, I am passionate about educating about.
I’m often asked how and why small doses of chemicals in our daily lives alter our health and one of the reasons is that some chemicals are actually even more potent in small doses. This is particularly true with hormones or endocrine disrupting chemicals because they are mimicking or blocking your own hormone system.
So let me throw out some statistics to help you get some context before I do my best to break it down for you.
- Women use an average of 12 personal care products containing 168 ingredients daily
- Teenage girls use an average of 17 personal care products a day with 16 potentially toxic cosmetics chemicals (including phthalates, triclosan, parabens and musks) found in the bodies of teenage girls
- Today girls are now entering puberty earlier than a generation ago – in part due to exposures to endocrine disruptors (substances that can alter the body’s hormonal responses)
- Early puberty puts girls at a higher risk for breast cancer later in life
- Endocrine disruption threatens the bodies natural metabolic state and healthy hormonal communication, potentially inciting a plethora of health problems
Alright, now I’m going to break it down for you.
If you were to place cells in a petri dish and dose it with a ton of BPA (chemical found in plastics) or a ton of phthalates (chemical found in personal care products, cosmetics and more), your cell receptors will actually shut off because your body is so smart and recognizes that they aren’t real hormones. Essentially, your body communicates to itself that “gosh, that’s a weird signal – don’t interact with that.” If you have a tiny bit of phthalates being released from your shower curtain, personal care products, gragrance in your body lotion, hair spary or even nail polish – low doses all day long, your body will be fooled into thinking that they are actually your natural hormones and your body will be fooled into turning on and off your signaling receptors and pathways.
So, what does that actually mean?
It means that small doses of chemicals can have a big and dangerous impact on our health. Furthermore, many of these chemicals we expose ourselves to (and lather upon our bodies in a variety of ways), has been linked to cancers, reproductive problems, learning disabilities, early puberty, heart disease, obesity and more.
What to do? Be curious, investigate, support companies who are transparent with their ingredients and who create safe products. You can use the EWG Skin Deep App to check the safety rating on all of your personal care products and cosmetics.